Finally, Papa was here with me at BLR. I could see how agitated he sounded and wanted to be with me here, at home 🥹
He was here for 4 days (untill today) to attend some agriculture related workshop but turned out that it was in Marathi language and Papa couldn't follow the discourse at it's speed due to language constraints.
I was also resuming work after my vacations and there was a lot to catch-up on.
But I guess when your hearts are weird together, world's pace or chatter doesn't matter. I had told him that he can leave the training and get home and had left a spare key for him, incase he comes while I am at work.
But our timings matched beautifully, I could leave office earlier than my usual time and as soon as I returned home, I rushed back on my beloved two wheeler and did some quick grocery and fruit shopping. Papa had called me and given a heads-up that another uncle is joining him for the visit.
I guess, once in a while, I love hosting people. I was in my happy mode on :). I was ready with some exotic fruits, washed, cleaned, cut and plated before they arrived. Later we continued chatting and then it was time for the customary ginger tea (insider joke - I tell myself, after Modiji, it could be me 🤣🤣).
Since, the weather was a bit cold or because I was still recovering from cold, I was tempted to make some pakodas and asked them both if ok. They never said No 😄🤫...(Side effects so two nights of sober ashram food)
From my initial conversation with Dad - uncle would be leaving back after snacks. It got 7:43 pm when I offered dinner, thinking that I would either take them out to a nearby millet food shop or order something soothing but they dint want rice and I was like ordering thing from five places, I rather cook it myself.
I took my two wheeler, got some ladies finger, curds etc and got busy in the kitchen again. Somewhere in my heart I was constantly switching between a kind hearted, loving me who so dearly wanted to cook and host my own people, those who are elderly, around whom I grew-up and one who I know are brought-up in a very caring environment with high dependency on women's of the house for a would satisfying meals and so apt and in synch with the cycle of weather Vs the angry me as I hadn't as attend the pending tasks at work, post my return and was possibly also fighting the image of a household girl...one who has super powers but I very clearly knew I do not and nor was I seeking any validation from outside....more so when cooking at home, also means a heavy pipe of dishes too and offcourse everything has to happen in the today, that today can extend to past midnight...upto 2 am too.
But I constantly pulled my focus on the preparations and told my mind that food carries the energy, like words and intentions. So, I was concious and told myself to stay in the present moment and be kind and non-judgmental.
At last, around 8.15 pm, the dinner was ready and seeing the deep satisfaction on their faces healed my heart. It washed-off all of it's vices. Then, the uncle was getting late and we arranged a auto for him. Later, I got back to the messy kitchen, cleaned it all, shifted all the leftover food to smaller bowls, but then decided to empty them in my stomach and put it all for wash.
Dad was sitting in the hall and I asked him to rest a bit as his knees were hurting badly all day long. I feel sad when I see how much pain he bears...
I finished cleaning and rushed to take a warm water shower and change to some relaxed nightwear shorts. I then took the knee oil (from kalayshastra) told Dad that I will do his knee and head massage. By the time we finished it, it got 12.30 am then I was sharing with him all my work stories and people I met, people who supported me and had been so kind to me etc. I could see he was tired but his eyes were so eager to hear me tirelessly ans I felt pity on him ... I let him head for his due rest and had made his bed with a fresh clean bedsheet.
I retired to another room and logged in at work for a while and could hear Dad snoring....
For some reasons, I remembered Bai (my Granny) so much, all thru the day.
And when I went to bed, I could feel a bit of unexplainable stress, so practiced box breathing and don't know when I was out of this world.
Today morning, I woke up at seven am but was deeply relaxed. I could hear Dad's throat clearing sound and knew he was up. Instead of rushing out, I just laid back and slowly got up because I knew I had a long day ahead.
Thankfully, I have had soaked some dry fruits last night and also was ready with breakfast menu. Knowing Dad had taken light dinner, last night and would get hungry this morning, I got straight into the kitchen, gave him to munch on the soaked dry fruits, take some warm water and then I prepared breakfast and hi tea.
Later, made the plan for the day about everything on my plate from work, to kitchen to Dad's travel shopping to cooking dinner and packing it for train and dropping him at the station.
And like a robot, I was heads-down with it all untill 5.11pm when I made myself and Dad some lemon tea with suger and also Basilur tea in a mini tea pot. At that moment, my heart knew I could take thousands such births to spend that little time on Hand and share my love for my Dad....
At 5:30 we got our auto for the train station, Dad also met my owner Uncle and Aunty and we started off. It was another journey of 60 mins and the auto driver was kind.
At the station, we argued a bit on sharing the luggage load as I wasn't allowing him to take on too much or hurt knee by stress waking....
I settled him at the waiting area of allocated platform and others from his travel group joined him.
Then I had to do some runaround to get a platform ticket, stood and waited in a long que, later pulled out due to lack of exact currency change to purchase, looked for ticket dispenser machine and that was outside the main building and walked there, again I met another que but comparatively shorter one but just when it my turn, the support staff shut it down as something wasn't working... One aunty was being me in the queue and I asked her if I shall buy two tickets so that I can use my currency as it else via online QR code... She agreed.
Infact, she pulled out two exact change notes and offered me to buy. I was touched with his generosity. Before taking it, I verified if she has money tranfer via activate and she said yes.
It so happened that only one ticket came out for two people and because I was too exhausted by now, I told that aunty's son to keep it and I took a picture of it and we bid goodbye.
I rushed back to the platform where Dad and his team was, we all chatted for a while and seeing they all happy together, I took leave and have a side hug to Dad... that I got to see and stay with him for atleast this short time.
I walked toward the bridge connecting the platform to metro line and boarded ... Was choked for a s few mins, Hungary, tired and suddenly very relieved too.
Just now, I also remembered that I had taken Dad to a nearby lake temple which he had loved when he had come first time... We sat there seeing a pair of eagle and gray white heron each chasing and it was such a sight to witness... Especially the heron in flight.... Magestic and Swift!
My heart lived that moment in its totality she felt happy.... Papa was sitting on one of the bench as if he has arrived into his relaxed state...💝✍️.
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Thank you, Papa. I love you so much and already missing you...I am truly blessed to have you by my side. I salute your innocent tender heart and kindness 🙏🙏🙏❣️❣️. Miss you so much, Paaaa...
Your daughter.
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