Wonderful bond of Faith - Brahminy Kite and me

7th July 2024

(Artificial intelligence version)

A cold wind whipped across the terrace yesterday evening as I paced in an "infinity loop," audiobook playing but unheard. My mind was a whirlwind – thoughts of relocation, work, self-doubt, all swirling together. Suddenly, a sticky web brought me back to reality with a jolt. This wasn't your average spiderweb; it was strangely strong and clung to me like a thousand invisible spikes.

A giggle escaped my lips as I imagined the scene from my neighbor's perspective – a spotlight illuminating my frantic attempts to disentangle myself, a scene straight out of a Mr. Bean show.

Needing a break from the mental clutter, I looked up. The vast sky, ever-present, offered solace. Birds dotted the twilight canvas, their silhouettes a calming sight. My heart quieted, replaced by a peaceful exhaustion.

One last gaze skyward before bidding it goodnight, a deep longing filled me. The Brahminy Kite, a rare and auspicious visitor, had been absent for far too long. Often, I'd spot them while doing chores or enjoying a cup of tea on my balcony, their graceful flight a source of constant joy.

With a silent request, I expressed my wish to see them again.

This morning, amidst a flurry of other kites, a Brahminy Kite appeared. Elated and filled with awe, I stood there, the magic of the moment a beautiful answer to a simple yearning.

This experience served as a reminder – sometimes, the greatest comfort lies in the simple act of looking up, appreciating the vastness above, and reconnecting with nature's wonders.

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(raw draft - human version)

This morning, between 7:45 - 8:30 am I got the best surprise for my day. The surprise was even more touching because it was a request answered in the most magical way.

Let's take a step back to 'yesterday evening' when I was feeling a bit low and wanted to engage in some activity to breakaway from the dullness, feeling of exhaustion from overthinking. I chose to play an audio book and take 'infinity-loop' walk on the terrace. The weather was cold and bit windy too...with no traces of rains.

Though, I was listening to the audio book, my thoughts eventually drifted from: relocating to home-town, the practicality of it, to whether continue with the current employer or move away or even re-start with permaculture and a farm-stay back at home, to ongoing events at office, to sports (I would like to engage with), to self doubt, to present - maintain an 'infinity loop' with my foot steps, to the messy, sticky and itchy spider or ant's web that I got entangled with! 

Oops....God really has a wonderful way of bringing me back to track :). I then lost the train of my thoughts and got busy feeling that weird stickiness on my right cheek and the lower arm that was lifted to de-tangle me...:P (I know, too dramatic). 

My thoughts were now busy analyzing the strong and strange web. 'Strong' because this was consecutively the third day when I bumped into it (probably it was too dark) and this time, I unknowingly scraped it from each of it's anchoring points: clothes line wires, the TV dish antenna and the terrace floor. 'Strange' because, this one in-particular, felt very different. The thread glued to my body was like a thin strand with invisible spikes which would open-up in all its mightiness when in-touch with humans. 

I was also giggling at the realization - how the night lamp from neighbor's terrace, shining on me like a spot light and how with all my shake-it-off gestures, the neighbour's would feel I may probably the live streaming of of one of Mr. Bean's show. 

Well, then I had to continue with my walk and a thought crossed my mind, what was it that use to bring me ease on such walks? And I looked-up at the sky. No matter what time or day of my life, this sky has always been my constant and shelter, my sounding board and my guiding canvas. I continued to walk with my head held up, towards the sky and saw a few birds heading back home, some bats, few grey and late Herons (I could identify from their silhouette). And the chatter in mind stopped, heart was at peace, in the moment and body tired and sleepy.

Just before greeting goodnight to the sky, I looked-up for one final time and had this deep urge and longing to see the Brahminy Kite. Which are a very rare-sight. And this time its been so long that it made a visit to me. I consider them as an auspicious presence which would fill me with ecstasy and my eyes would be glued to the sky following their calming flight trajectory

I use to often spot them in te afternoons, while washing clothes on terrece or during early evenings from my balcony which overlooks the vast sky in a panaromic view, where I would be having my evening tea.  . I always loved their carefree fight and have developed a special bond with them.

And that night, I requested the kite to pay me a visit and that I am missing seeing it. 

This morning it quietly appeared amongst other kites and I stood elated - filled with awe.

From Gentle Hands to Brushed Aside: A Lesson in Lost Sensitivity

I have been avoiding writing about this event that pulled my attention inwardly, on the lack of sensitivity for tiny living beings.

Growing up, in a joint family setup, I have had the privilege of absorbing (mostly unconsciously) some certain religious beliefs and customs, including ways in which one love and live life with the ecosystem around.

For instance, my grandmother was extremely loving, jovial and deeply understanding. She was very devoted to clean surroundings and I have seen how Diwali cleaning would literally mean deep cleaning; with every nook and corner of a household of 13 members being looked at. The biggest and longest project would be kitchen. Though it meant grueling times for my Mom and aunts, it was the most fun exercise for me.

Among other kids, being the closest one to Grandmother, I was also her right hand. I can say our vibes matched :). I would be the helping hand for tasks that needs some acrobatic (or say Monkey :P) skills like climbing the wooden stool, mopping the fan with a piece of discarded sock worn over a wooden brush with bristles (usually used to clean bedsheets), or to clean any top shelves, a showcase or even the top surface of a cabinet like wooden temple mounted on a wall. With the showcase, it was like a Pandora's box. If we stumbled upon any long-lost item or a forgotten one, there would be numerous stories that would pour out from recalling those episodes

I used to thoroughly enjoyed it all and the feeling of accomplishment after seeing my Grandmother's happy face was out of this world. Well...that was about Diwali cleaning.

There is another event I recall about the eldest of my Aunt who was deeply devoted and followed all the Jain rituals with discipline and she would do daily Pratikaman which is supposed to be done twice a day. And I would observe her dedication and devotion...and use to think she probably got it from her parents. I had met them and they were the most simplest of all yet the kindest.

My eldest Aunt, she is and the most disciplined and detached but extremely adjusting in her nature and also the most considerate among all the other ladies in the house. With all the knowledge that she would share with me, I always felt there are very few people who understood her...but felt she was blessed to have the most loving and caring Husband (my Bade papa). I recall from my childhood that whenever she would sit to do the Pratikaman, before putting the mat on the floor, she would makesure to sweep the floor with a white soft wool broom with a small loop handle. This was done to avoid harming any tiny insects.

Also, growing-up I have seen how we would never hurt any mice or any other insects like lizard or cockroaches but we would rather capture them and release them in the open grounds...far away from the home.

What nudged me to write blogpost was - this incident that took place three days back. At my BLR residence, I was in the kitchen making me some snacks (got hungry after my commute from office). From my kitchen, what I saw was an active black patch on the opposite wall, the one next to main entrance door of the house. The instant feeling was that of ugh! :(

With a knife in my one hand and broomstick in the other, I rushed closer to find that there is a whole colony of tiny humble black ants..each holding a white tiny cotton ellipse-like ball with it....but out of anger or disgust, I thought brushing them with broom would be the best and I can straight away land them out of my home in one powerful broom stroke and that's what I did! the next moment I realized, I was such a fool to have thought they would be obedient and will go as per my plan! rather, half of them landed on my foot!!

And then what, the next moment I stomped on some of them in my effort to shoo them away from over my foot, but all in vane. The rest of them have already sensed the panic and the whole colony was all over the floor of my living room. I was heart broken coz I never intended to hurt them but I couldn't control my irritation and felt disgusted about me. My neighbor was around and her sister said...just put some sugar or rice grains and they will disappear in few mins. This was the exact moment I was nostalgic, (remembering something similar growing-up and we would add wheat flour and not hurt a single insect), I was sad and teary eyed for killing some of those innocent insects and their babies, I was disgusted with myself for making a mountain out of an anthill (read - molehill). And I questioned myself, how this rushed-up life has changed me to be less sensitive :(.

I pray for those tiny life which were lost that day...May God bless their soul and bless me with compassion to be a little gentler in general with self and others.