Some new beginnings..

 The second quarter has been going pretty packed and sometimes I am still in that inertia of a busy or eventful day/s..

With work commitments to personal ones like- meeting visiting relatives which required two hours of commute, one way, on a weekend; hosting friends who were staying over for a weekend on their way back from Kerala trip, to planning my home visit and align it to other work commitments...that's not all, plan my own work related travel and continuing with the trend, club it with a leisure travel too :)

Oh wait....I forgot the time for reading stories and romcoms :)

With all those stuff, comes shopping 🛍️ too :)!! Mostly online but actually offline! where my being is convinced that whatever I am purchasing is what I am in love with...yeah, I have directed all my love towards me now!! Be it life. Shopping, even having a fight with a boss... It's all in the awareness that I LOVE MYSELF :).

And if at all, I am slowly slipping into that mode where I  start to question my life, feel the panic or mid-life crises, when a certain events throws me off my emotional balance and I would spend hours weeping and venting, only to reciver over a cup of hot chocolate...  my "BIG @ss calendar" pasted on the backside of door of my house, nudges me. And reminds me of one activity to pull me out of my comfort zone and this is an occurance for every second day, after a two weeks window. 

To make it easier for myself, on one working day, I even did a brain dump of all that I wish to do or like. Glimpse 👇 

And this whole reminder thing keeps me on my toes, keeps me focused on what matters to me and at times a beautiful nudge that past is gone and I need to move on with the now, turn the page, forgive myself on tough days and see life as a whole ...one that I take an effort to craft, one day at a time, one activity at a time, one circle at a time.

And for June the most memorable was :

1. Heart to heart conversation or say one way venting (but I brokedown badly, but I stayed with me 💝. Great job Tan!)

2. Attending the AGAM band event which was in collaboration with Akashya Patra - Music for Meals. How beautiful!! A cause and art coming together...both my favourites.

3. Starting weights training and attending a yoga session at work. 

3. Planning Amritsar - Golden Temple visit 🤞.

And would like to take a small moment of gratitude and deep appreciation for Life and it's magic, it's flow.

I am also going to create a small card for myself :

"Let us come, let it go...Let it Flow...Breath" 

Had read this somewhere and since then it's on my mind :)

--

Loads of love, Tan.

Half way through

It's like life coming to a full circle. A surreal moment! I'm still unable to believe what just took place and I was in it...

Drowning in episodes of my life, I'm being pulled back to that loud cheer of the audience, to the mystical presence of the lead singer and his voice...

Me, sitting there, remembering everything that went by in these 18 years... how this music band's journey has been interlaced with these 18 years of my own life —one that I started in this very city.

I wept, I smiled, I jumped out of my seat in sheer happiness. I felt deep gratitude, longing, and the lightheartedness of letting go and letting life flow.

I found myself surprised at this side of me who could be so enthralled that nothing else existed around or within me, completely immersed in the music and the composition—a mesmerizing sight of unbelievable bliss.

Yes, it was AGAM The Band! An introduction 18 years ago marked the commencement of my journey in this lonely part of the planet—my world then, to what is my now. There were a few heartbreaks along the way (or maybe many), but some introduced me to myself, whereas others tore me apart to find a new me that I would have been shying away from. All in all, it's the 15th of June—exactly halfway through this year, or just 15 more days to go. It's also the month I came to this city 18 years back. :)

A lot has happened, a lot has gone past, and sometimes it makes me wonder how I could even survive it all. Or maybe I only felt the deep impacts from all the painful events and testing times. But today, in my heart, I hold gratitude for life and for it's continuous flow, even when I resisted. 🙏❤️