Being heard & acknowledged

 

Not a complaint in anyway, but peace after going thru a state of un-awareness to self-awareness to denial about the fact, experiencing internal conflict at every step, hurt from exteriors to that self-imposed ones for not being able to respectfully allow acceptance ...those questioning  times about how such a bond can be evaluated as hurtful or damaging... it's so hard, especially with deeper eternal wiring of ethics, respect and what you see normal from societal point of view.

In many ways, I have come a long way, the many battles, sometimes all at ones or prolonged greif but I was looked after well, I was loved and  cared for, respected in the worst of my days when I would have had the most dark side of me surfacing.

I am deeply grateful for this life force within and for all that came as blessings in my life.

🙏💝💕

Love 24x7

On my way back from office, I saw an automobile service centre signboard and right next to it - a big rectangular signboard with red colored boxed letters saying "Emergency 24 x 7", yes, it was an electric signboard outside a hospital.

A thought instantly crossed my mind...

Can there be a possibility of "Love  24 x 7"?  Then possibly we will never call anything as "emergency 24 x 7", Can anyone guarantee the other to make them feel loved all the time? Or let's say the one receiving love, Can they feel it 24 x 7? 

I know this sounds unrealistic for many but why is it that I get such thoughts and I totally believe in them (even though I cannot myself promise to be all loving all the time 😅). 

And I am well aware of my feelings of deprived of Vitamin Love, a lot many times! And a part of me who just wants to be there in the childhood and not feel intimidated by the world of grown-ups.

-- (after a gap of 60 mins)

I shed some tears while on the phone speaking with a friend and asked where have I got lost? What happened to me? I was joy and love but today it all feels like an effort... why? Why is it that I am feeling suffocated...what is it that I am seeking? what should I change and how can I help myself?

To this vulnerable conversation, I was told,

 - " try and live in the here and now. Find joy in simplest of events, don't get overwhelmed by thinking the wholistic picture of life all at one time...don't get scared by it.

Know that we all will shed a bit of us as we near the end of our life's journey but knowing that that's the beauty and ease of life and we still are in our 'now'! so be greatful, we still have that now...

-- 

I know I am feeling overwhelmed with work timelines, my upcoming travels, mom and aunty's travel the limited time am left with and everything in between... I guess I will just Hug myself real right 🫂💖✍️💕